January is the month of birthday gifts for me even though my birthday is in June. Keene is my first gift and Cheri is my second.
Before my middle child was born on January 22 three plus decades ago, I worried (of course I did; it’s a habit).
Could I love her as much as my first child, my sweet daughter, the child of my dreams? What if I don’t have enough love? What if I can’t manage two? What if this baby never decides to come (she was a full two weeks late). What if, what if, what if. As usual, my worries were all wasted energy.
Our second child, another daughter, became Cheri—my love—and her first lesson to me was that love grows exponentially. Not only could I love her as much as her sister, having her in my life made my love so much more complete. She was, and still is, so different from her older sister Val but both of them are fabulous in their own right and such gifts to me and to the world. Val is exuberant, talkative, intense, and physical while Cheri is gentle, quiet, intense in a completely different way, and introspective.
The Challenge of a Renaissance Child
Early on I dubbed Cheri my renaissance child because she was so smart, so interested in everything, and so talented in so many different ways. Even then she challenged me to grow intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually just to keep up with her.
Throughout her life she continued to challenge my assumptions, my beliefs, my actions. Not all those challenges were comfortable. However, even in the challenges (which continue), she remains gentle and thoughtful, she always acts with supreme integrity, and is consistently emotionally honest – all traits to admire and imitate.
I marvel at the woman she is, the mother she’s become. She continues to teach me through the ways she chooses to live her life and I am blessed to have her as my daughter.
Though my concept of the Divine differs some from hers, Cheri has never been spiritually lazy or indifferent. And I know she has a deep knowledge of the Inner Divine that guides her. I found this prayer this morning by Tosha Silver and I offer it to my Cheri, my love, on this joyful day, the anniversary of her birth.
Happy Birthday my sweet Cheri. You already embody all the wishes and concepts in this prayer. You are amazing!
To the Inner Divine:
Divine Beloved, change me into One who joyously embraces Your Plan for me.
Fill with me with Your Divine courage and enthusiasm.
Free me from all fears and resistances, wishing only to serve You in every way. Fill me with patience and faith as I take the steps You show.
Let Your wishes alone come true for I have learned they constantly surprise and thrill me.
Free me from all old and really-frickin-totally-boring-by-now doubts, fears and confusion, knowing EVERY step will be revealed at the right time.
EVERY door will fling open at the right moment. Use me as You will!
And let me trust all the perfect assistance and help is ALREADY selected.
May Your Blessed Hand carry me in every way. Let me relax and enjoy!
And Change Me into One who can have a raucous, fabulous time knowing all outcomes belong to You alone.
I am Yours.
You are Mine.
WE are One.
All is well.
Tosha Silver Copyright 2014